There is an EVENT and each parent brings their RESPONSE to it and depending on their response, that determines the OUTCOME, in other words E+R=O.
If you don’t like your OUTCOMES, instead of blaming the EVENT (the child spilled the milk and I lose it), you can change your RESPONSE (‘Ann; that was a silly thing to do, get a cloth and we’ll mop it up). Being PROACTIVE may even mean I think ahead and keep milk in a sturdy jug in the fridge for easy poring for small hands. In other words, between whatever happens to you and your response, there is a space. In that space is the freedom for you to choose you own response. You can choose to breathe deeply, count to 10, ask your partner/husband to take over – whatever you need to do to stay calm.
Choose your response today – and if you forget – that’s okay too – just apologise as you are human and on reflection many of us would have changed our reaction. That’s where the PAUSE button comes in, if you want to be more PROACTIVE instead of being REACTIVE, hit your PAUSE button so you get to choose your RESPOINSE, which is usually a better one.
Observe yourself today and you will respond better – and take care of yourself, so you can take care of everything and everyone else.