Key Tips: You cannot take care of anyone; till you first take care of youself

  • Give yourself more time, getting up earlier/allowing adequate time to you are calmer
  • The more attention you give; the less they demand
  • When a child feels right; they behave right; so get in touch with how they feel and give them a sense of being understood
  • Children are calmer; when parents role model Respect, Kind without being Cross, and remaining calm (separate)
  • A child who is troubled/troubling is not out to make your life difficult; rather they are showing you how difficult life is for them
  • Compassion therefore is the No 1 response to challenging behaviour
  • Pull out of power struggles; engage their co operation by giving them the time First!
  • Take an action for self; rather than against the child
  • Don’t personalise their behaviour; everything they say is about them, allow expression. “When you calm down; I can talk with you; I love you; but I will not accept that behaviour”.
  • It’s not the behaviour – it’s the ‘why’ of the behaviour that counts.